Skinny Buzzard Gulch–where the Sheriff has a major inferiority complex, the Whore with the Heart of Gold carries a hand cannon, the Bad Guy brandishes a hair wand, the Native American is the smartest guy in the room, and the buzzards are all hungry because… ZOMBIES!!!!
This is a play I wrote for my son’s high school Drama department. The school put on plays mostly written before 1961, I think, because putting on anything contemporary cost the school big bucks. And I do mean big. And I thought, yeesh, the school should have something to produce that was contemporary, had jokes that pushed a few boundaries, and was something that teenagers would actually enjoy acting in.
But nothing like that existed. So I wrote Skinny Buzzard Gulch for them.
The play was produced at my son’s high school, and was vastly amusing to most, particularly those under 20 years of age. Which was the audience I’d intended, anyway. It was the only play that season that made money, which worked out well for the school as it funded the subsequent production.
More importantly for me, it was a total gas to see it onstage, and to see the kids really enjoying acting in it.
I offer this play freely to all public high schools to produce. (In all circumstances, the copyright is mine.) If your high school is private, or if you belong to a community theater group that would like to produce it, please contact me to negotiate payment. I promise to be cheap. Writing and re-writing this play was way more fun than any effort should be, but it was still an effort and it took me a lot of hours. So, ya, if you are not a public high school, email me.
So! here is Skinny Buzzard Gulch: A Zombie Western. Share it all you like, it’s all to the good so long as it supports public high schools and those charming and ebullient vortices of energy known as Drama Kids.
If you do produce it, I ask one thing: send me the Grit voodoo doll prop, signed by the cast. My address is on the first page of the script. I promise to be hugely amused.